Things I Felt When Listening to a Song (02)

deandra
3 min readMay 12, 2023

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I may just know this song recently when I and my friends decided to watch Coldplay’s Music of the Spheres World Tour at the cinema. Before the movie starting, I listened to the set list and this song came out. Let Somebody Go featuring Selena Gomez. It was my first time knowing that Coldplay had a featuring song with Selena Gomez. So I listened to the song. I listened to it again during the movie screening in the cinema while reading the lyrics.

All the storms we weathered and everything that we went through. Now without you, what on earth am I to do?

When you love somebody, then it hurts like so to let somebody go.

I know right that moment that it was a heartbreak song. I was grateful that I did not feel relatable to that song because the song seemed very sad.

Once I asked him, “How much do you trust me?”

He answered, “I trust you so much. I know you are loyal to me and I trust that. I know you will always be with me. And I also know that you love me too.”

“…even when I never say it to your face,” I added.

“Even when you never say it to me,” he confirmed.

I am never a person who says I love you — even when he tells me those three words every day and I still always feel butterflies in my stomach every time I read those words, I feel so cheesy when I reply I love you with an “I love you too”, so I never do that.

But when Chris and Selena sing this line,

When you love somebody, got to let somebody know.

I cannot help myself to find his contact in my phone. I remember he sent me a bunch of messages beforehand, telling me that he already arrived home and just finished showering. I avoided his updated activities and immediately typed an “I love you” to him. He replied immediately, maybe feeling shocked because he knows I never do that. “I know :)” he replied. I felt a breath of relief. I am forever grateful to be able to say I love you and get a response immediately.

We had that kind of love I thought it would never end. Oh my lover, oh my other, oh my friend.

This song keeps reminding me of my old friends in high school. A couple. They had been dating since junior high school and had gotten married. The girl had already given birth to a lovely baby boy. But his husband suddenly passed away quickly, without any notice or sign. Until now, I could not bear to imagine how to live without the love of her life, to imagine seeing her baby son and not breaking into tears because his face reminded her so much of her husband. I could not bear to imagine missing someone without being able to say it and get an immediate response, whether it’s a touch, a kiss, a hug, or even just a simple phone call with the words “I miss you too”, but instead I can only hold the tombstone and said that without reply. Now I know what this song means,

It hurts like so to let somebody go.

The last line of the lyrics is like a reminder to me, to always cherish every moment and be grateful for his presence.

It hurts like so to let somebody go. But you’re still with me, now I know.

This story was written in memory of Aryabhama. Bham, we might be not as close as a friend though we were classmates for several years but I remember your presence during my school days every time. I did not have an easy feeling since you left. The thought of Meylia losing someone she loves so much makes my heart ache. Thank you for the reminder every day. Rest easy in heaven, my friend.

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deandra
deandra

Written by deandra

Writing whatever, wherever, and whoever stays in mind.